Shine up your 35-word (exact-anything over will be disqualified) pitches and the first 150-words (if the cut-off falls in the middle of a sentence, go to the end of that sentence) of your finished Adult, Young Adult, and Middle Grade fiction. We'll pick 60 entries to move on to the Agent Pitch Match. 

We've doubled the number of entries we're taking in this time. There will be a percentage of what genres make it in based on all the agents likes. You guessed it, there will be more YA in the contest than Adult, but the main thing we're looking for is the WOW factor. Only one entry per person.

We have two submission times, and this year we're holding it on a Saturday. 

The windows open on September 1 ...

Submissions will be emailed to brendadrakecontests@gmail.com. All email submissions received before the submission times will be deleted.

Only the best of the best will make it to the final round.

Sarah Nicolas

Becca Coffindaffer

Marieke Nijkamp

The winners of a first chapter critique for the Query Workshop by Random.org are:

KL Layton

Andrew Patterson

Please email me the first chapter of your manuscript to brendadrakecontests@gmail.com.

  

Coming up after Pitch Madness... 

The Teenaged Nitpick critiques by John Hansen (@ABoredAuthor). John will critique ten lucky winners in a drawing to receive a first page critique from him and posted on my blog the week of September 24. This is for young adult finished/unfinished manuscripts any genre.

John is a high school student and an intern for Pam van Hylckama of Larsen Pomada Literary Agents. You may have seen him answering questions on Leigh Ann Kopan's Ask A Teen hashtag #YAWritersAAT. He brings the teen perspective to his critiques. You can get more information about John on his site The Incessant Droning Of A Bored Writer.

Look for more details and for the Rafflecopter to go live on the blog on September 17. 

Twelve-year-old Maggie McCoy wants to be brave and spontaneous. But she’s not. Especially when it comes to school bullies and flying by the seat of her pants. So when she and her fearless cousin Jake stumble upon century-old clues leading to gold coins hidden by Butch Cassidy—farm boy turned infamous bank robber of the Wild West—she crumples her ‘to-do’ list to prove she really can be daring and impulsive. 

And at first, searching for gold with Jake and their quirky Grandpa Jim in his beat-up motorhome is the grand adventure she's always wanted—especially when Maggie learns they can use the money to save a camp for troubled youth. But her new found courage falters when she realizes they must outsmart and outrun a dangerous thief who is also after the treasure. 

The race is on. But, just as the cousins think they have solved the mystery, Jake is captured, and all the‘to-do’ lists in the world won’t save him. Only Maggie can, if she finds her bravery. 

RACE TO BUTCH CASSIDY'S GOLD is a 41,500-word middle grade mystery where Maggie's present-day adventures parallel Butch Cassidy's past until mystery and history collide. This book contains sneaky bits of Utah history and has the potential for a series of fast-paced adventures across the fifty states. 

With a Master’s degree in Elementary Education, I have been both an elementary and middle school classroom teacher.I am a regular attendee of writers’ conferences and have three published magazine articles. I created the successful marketing website, Giveaway Today,with an apex of 176,000 page views per month.

I believe you would be interested in my middle grade novel, RACE TO BUTCH CASSIDY’S GOLD.

   

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

B's critique ...

I believe you would be interested in my middle grade novel, RACE TO BUTCH CASSIDY’S GOLD. (You already give this information above. And I wouldn't use this statement. Just end it like this... Thank you for your time and consideration.) 

 

This premise sounds fun and exciting. And I've been rooting for it to get noticed by agents. You have most of the stuff you need in this query. Just add a little more of the narrator's voice in it. You want it to stand out in the slush. 

       

Dear AgentName,

Since she was six years old, Stacy has seen her future self whenever she looks in the mirror. Growing up with your future self in the mirror has its perks: "Older Me" has supported Stacy through her parents’ divorce, bullying and a broken heart. She's been a trusted confidante who can’t get Stacy in trouble and who won’t torment her like most of her peers.

But at seventeen, Stacy’s beginning to wonder if she wants to become the 29-year-old she sees in the mirror. When Older Me tells Stacy not to declare her feelings for her best friend, Mark. Stacy refuses. To keep Stacy from getting hurt, Older Me is forced to admit she’s lied about not remembering her past -- Stacy’s present.

Older Me claims she did it to help Stacy to avoid mistakes she made. But soon Stacy learns Older Me enjoyed the life Stacy wishes for -- popularity, success, and most of all, Mark. Stacy can’t see how her derided, lonely, high school experience could ever be superior to Older Me’s seemingly perfect alternative.

With their relationship strained to its limits, and the clock ticking towards eighteen (the age Older Me was when Stacy arrived in her mirror), Stacy is determined to do whatever it takes to find her version of Older Me's life for herself – even if herself is the person she’ll hurt most.

LISTEN TO ME is a YA contemporary that plays with the time-space continuum, complete at 89,000 words. The premise was inspired by the www.dearteenme.com website in which adult authors write letters to their teen selves.

Thank you for your time.

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

B's critique ...


This is such a cool concept, but the query is a little too vague in places. You hint at the plot and the stakes but don't completely reveal them. You want to entice an agent not confuse them. We're not asking you to give away the resolution of the story, just an understanding of what is driving your characters. I'd keep reading this because I fell in love with the premise right off.

 Dear Awesome Agent,

Seventeen-year-old Johnny thought getting beaten and branded out of gang life was the worst thing imaginable. He was wrong.

When a couple of thugs chase him away from the shelter he currently calls home and into a different neighborhood, a woman helps him escape and then offers him a place to stay. Motivated by food, clean clothes, and a shower, he accepts, vowing to make a break for it at the first sign of trouble.

Seventeen-year-old Alicia has kept quiet about a lot of the changes her mom made after her brother, Danny, died—a new neighborhood, new school, and new dreams. But when her mom saves a thug from the streets, she draws the line. She’s been avoiding scum like Johnny her whole life. But her mom is on a mission and fails to listen which means war. Johnny’s gotta go.

But as Johnny and Alicia begin to trust each other, they realize they have more in common than avoiding scum: Guilt.  Johnny’s guilt over his girlfriend’s death doesn’t allow him to trust his feelings, and Alicia’s guilt of surviving her brother has left her ignoring her dream to dance.

When trust begins to turn into something more, Alicia’s mom makes it perfectly clear she won’t tolerate a relationship between the two, leaving Johnny with a choice: give in to his feelings for Alicia and end up back on the streets, or bury his feelings like he’s buried those he loves.

THE SIMPLE TRUTH, a YA contemporary romance manuscript complete at 60,000 words, is a story about finding truth in dreams, hope, and love. I hope it will appeal to readers of Simone Elkeles.

Thank you for your consideration. 

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

B's critique ...

Dear Awesome Agent,

Seventeen-year-old Johnny thought getting beaten and branded out of gang life was the worst thing imaginable. He was wrong. (Okay, I'm hooked.)

When a couple of thugs chase him away from the shelter he currently calls home and into a different neighborhood, a woman helps him escape and then offers him a place to stay. After causing his girlfriend's death, he doesn't feel worthy of the kindness. (You should mention the girlfriend's demise up here before tying it in with Alicia's brother. You mention it as something that drives her in her paragraph but not in Johnny's - make sure to keep it balanced - just make it fit your story.)  Motivated by food, clean clothes, and a shower, he accepts, vowing to make a break for it at the first sign of trouble.

Seventeen-year-old Alicia has kept quiet about a lot of the changes her mom made after her brother, Danny, died—a new neighborhood, new school, and new dreams. But when her mom saves a thug from the streets, she Alicia ("she" could mean her mom in this sentence) draws the line. She’s been avoiding scum like Johnny her whole life. But her mom is on a mission and fails to listen to Alicia, which means war. (This sentence needs clarity.) Johnny’s gotta go.

But as Johnny and Alicia begin to trust each other, they realize they have more in common than avoiding scum. (use a period here not a colon) Guilt.  Johnny’s guilt over his girlfriend’s death (Maybe mention the girlfriend's death above before mentioning it here. You mention her brother's death in her paragraph. Keep it balanced.).doesn’t allow him to trust his feelings, and Alicia’s guilt of surviving her brother has left her ignoring her dream to dance.

When trust begins to turn into something more, Alicia’s mom makes it perfectly clear she won’t tolerate a relationship between the two, leaving Johnny with a choice: give in to his feelings for Alicia and end up back on the streets, or bury his feelings like he’s buried those he loves.

 THE SIMPLE TRUTH, a YA contemporary romance manuscript complete at 60,000 words, is a story about finding truth (I don't get "truth" - maybe "safety or acceptance"? Or trust? Maybe I just don't see it because all I see in the query is trust issues not lies. It may just be me and other may feel differently so see what they think.) in dreams, hope, and love, I hope it and will appeal to readers of Simone Elkeles.

Thank you for your consideration. 

This sounds like it would be a heart wrenching read. Getting the dual POV down in a query is difficult. Some say you should pick one POV and do the query in their view. And they're right most of the time. I say, if you can do it right and keep it balanced between the two, then it's great to get what's driving both characters and how they intersect together. I think yours works and flows nicely. But I would suggest trying both ways and see which one really captures your story and voice.

I love this sort of West Side Story!

I hope this helps. If you decide to revise and would like me to read it again, just post it in the comments of this post.

Okay, everyone, what do you think? 

And don't forget to stop by the other blogs and read their query critiques. For each critique you leave in the comments, you get an entry into the drawing to win one of three first chapter critiques from me. The opportunity ends 8/25 at 9AM EST.