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Monday, May 23, 2011
Power of Tension Blogfest
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| Find out all about the blogfest here! |
Cally Jackson and Rachel Morgan are holding the exciting Power of Tension Blogfest from May 23 through May 27. I've decided that this would be a wonderful opportunity to get out my cave and back into the writing world after a couple week hibernation.
So this is how they're doing it in their own words:
Give us an excerpt (up to 300 words) from your manuscript or recently completed work (or just a random scene) that just drips with tension and will tie us up in knots wanting to know more. It doesn’t matter what the piece is about, as long as it screams tension.
Click the link above to find out all the other details and the prizes to be had.
So here's my entry. It's an excerpt from my young adult urban fantasy, LIBRARY JUMPERS.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I turned to see what distracted him. "Why? What's wrong--?"
I saw him then and choked on my words. He was a muscled mountain of a man, bald and scarred. He didn't have to dodge pedestrians because they hurried out of his way.
"Who is that?" Nick asked.
"A hunter," Arik said with concern in his voice.
"Hurry! The T's just around the corner!" Afton yelled as she hustled up the street.
Nick chased her and Arik and I ran side by side after them, flying around the corner, and darting into the Park Street station.
Heavy breaths drummed behind me. The creep was right behind us. Arik grabbed a trashcan and slammed it into the hunter, the crumpled can crashing to the ground. The man swayed on his feet as he tried to recover. Arik grabbed my hand and pulled me down the steps, pushing through people along the way. My foot slipped on the last step and I nose-planted, sliding across the floor and crashing into a couple of bicycles. A kickstand cut into my calf and the pain seared through my body. Tasting a salty copper on my tongue, I felt my lip. It was cracked and bleeding.
Arik slid across the floor on his knees to me.
"No! Leave me." My eyes shot up to Afton and Nick flagging us to hurry before the car doors shut. "You have to help them."
The hunter reached the platform. His white marble eyes brushed across me. There wasn't an iris or a pupil in either one. A scar ran from the top of his bald head, down the right side of his face, and ended at his collarbone. He hurdled past us and headed toward Afton and Nick.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So that's it. You can check out the other participants by going here.
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OH, this is a great excerpt to submit! I loved the whole story, but yes, this has so much tension and makes me want to read it all over again. Happy writing and good luck in the contest!
ReplyDeleteNice job! I'm wondering who's hunting them and why. And that fall sounded really painful. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a really creepy guy - very nice!
ReplyDeleteGood choice!!
ReplyDeleteawesome job, this is the third one that i would seriously be shortlisting if it were up to me (which it isn't) Just my 2cents!
Sarah
Trish, thanks that's so kind!
ReplyDeleteCharity, yeah, I had a fall like that and I can attest that it was very painful.
Susan, the hunters are very creepy - they can't see - they're like blood hounds and are giving scents to follow and won't stop until they make the kill.
Wow, thanks Sarah, for the wonderful compliment.
You all rock! :D
Creepy guy! Wonder what he wants with Afton and Nick? Oh, and that fall sounded painful!
ReplyDeleteGood old chase scene. The creep factor was there as well as the tension. Well done!
ReplyDeleteLoved it! I agree with everyone when I say that fall sounded really painful! Great job! :)
ReplyDeleteNice energy build up for the next scene! Leaves the reading looking for more!
ReplyDeleteThose eyes really got me. All the action and then the white marble of his eyes. Great use of detail to punch up the tension.
ReplyDeleteEdge of Your Seat Romance
I loved this bit of description best: "He didn't have to dodge pedestrians because they hurried out of his way." - says a ton.
ReplyDeleteOuch! Very tense.
ReplyDeleteOh no! What's going to happen to Afton and Nick? Will Arik help them or the MC? Good job with the tension!
ReplyDeleteGreat action and descriptions. I really enjoyed this.
ReplyDeleteHi Brenda, I really enjoyed this. Graphic and tense, definitely left me wanting to find out more. Nice to meet you.
ReplyDeleteOh, I didn't expect the hunter to ran past them. So the other two are the ones he's after. Nice pacing, has me leaning toward the screen as if that will help me read faster.
ReplyDeleteI didn't expect the hunter to run past them, either. There's so much going on here! Definitely tension!
ReplyDeleteThere's a lot of energy to this excerpt, and a pace that doesn't let up. Great job.
ReplyDeleteVery tense! I loved the style of your writing, and how you managed to put in such minute detail when you had to keep it to so few words. For some reason the sentence "He didn't have to dodge pedestrians because they hurried out of his way" seemed just about perfect :)
ReplyDeleteGreat entry!! I definitely need/want to read on to find out what happens! :D
ReplyDeleteOh good job! So much tension. O.O I really want to know what happens next.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for your wonderful comments. I'm really enjoying all entries - you all are such terrific writers. :D
ReplyDeleteThat's one scary hunter - I totally felt the tension. Great job:)
ReplyDeleteI liked, "heavy breaths drummed behind me." Good luck!
ReplyDeleteDark, creepy, and full of tension. I'm a little scared!
ReplyDeletePower Of Tension Blogfest
An intense action scene. Terrific description especially when she fell. Excellent pacing, Brenda. I really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteThe descriptions and tension really made me as a reader get into this piece- well done.
ReplyDeleteOooo that does just drip tension and I'm dying to read more! Not to mention I'm intrigued by this Hunter idea. Loved it!
ReplyDeleteEeek! Why is the hunter after them? And does he catch Afton and Nick?
ReplyDeleteThanks for entering :-)
Excellent - I love a good chase scene. I'm dying to know why the hunter is after Afton and Nick!
ReplyDeleteOh ouch! And totally surprised that the Hunter didn't go after the MC. I suppose he/she was already injured enough to come back for later :)
ReplyDeleteGood entry! i love that the hunter's eyes are like white marble with mot irises or pupils - so creepy and inhuman!
ReplyDelete